TOW #11: "The Pitfalls of Dating and Mating With Social Media" by Tyler Curry

All of these social media sites and more, writer Tyler Curry of The Advocate argues,
can ruin a relationship by presenting narrow or outdated views of a person.

One would expect that those who oppose social media are middle-aged or elderly people, unused to the influence of technology in our modern world, or conservatives who believe that you should get to know someone in person by talking to them head-on.  However, in his op-ed piece published in LGBT-interest magazine The Advocate, Tyler Curry, a younger writer, familiar with social media, argues that it can ruin many relationships just after they begin by presenting a false or outdated image of a person and that people should "unplug" when it comes to finding "The One".  By apparently addressing the reader personally and giving numerous realistic examples, Curry definitely highlights the problems social media causes when it comes to dating and is probably successful at convincing readers to agree with him.
Most magazine articles would not address the reader as "you" or use phrasing like "your best foot forward", but Curry does this throughout "The Pitfalls of Dating and Mating With Social Media".  For example, he writes, "If you didn’t already Facebook-stalk the man you're meeting for Friday night plans, you most definitely will afterward. The updates he posts, the photos he takes, and the statuses he likes have become equally as important as the words out of his mouth" (Curry 1).  Using such personal phrasing causes the reader to identify with what Curry is writing about; "you" is much more up-close than "one" or "some people".  If Curry had used those words, a reader may think, "Oh, other people stalk their dates on Facebook? How weird!" However, when he uses "you" and "your", the reader thinks, "I've definitely done that from time to time", as they can't hide from it.  From personal identification with a claim, it is a short jump to identification and agreement with an argument as a whole.
Of course, Curry goes further to make the reader understand and agree with his argument by including examples of how social media can wreck a relationship.  He states, "He made you laugh, he was charming, and you left dinner a little intrigued. But you just couldn’t wait until he returned from his work trip, so you decided to perform a harmless Internet search. Some guys are just not very photogenic. Suddenly you’re questioning the real connection you had because you are having trouble picturing your wedding photos together" (1).  Obviously, Curry intimates, photographs do not show the real person, and should not be viewed as a window into the soul.  Even though you may have a date with someone and like them a lot, thanks to social media, you can find one minor undesirable detail about them that makes you dislike them; this prevents relationships from growing.  Besides highlighting undesirable traits, Curry argues later, profiles on social media sites can be outdated and provide a view only of how a person used to be, not who they are today.  With all of these examples, a reader cannot deny that social media can cause a lot of problems between two people who are dating, and they may even see that "unplugging" whilst on the dating scene is the best option.  

Article: http://www.advocate.com/commentary/tyler-curry/2013/11/22/op-ed-pitfalls-dating-and-mating-social-media